'Loving Christian Relationships'

By Rev.Bola

Loving relationships are the heart of a healthy, growing church.
Jesus said people will know we are his disciples by our love. Practical demonstration of love builds authentic Christian community and brings others into God's kingdom.

Research indicates that there is a highly significant relationship between the ability of a church to demonstrate love and its long-term growth potential. Growing churches possess on the average a measurably higher "love quotient" than stagnant or declining churches. (note: the most frequent surveys of churches with more than 1000 in attendance, indicate that is the quality characteristic of "loving relationships that is the predominant factor of growth. Wherever there is a lack of love, further church development is severely hampered.

It can be shown that there is a significant connection between "laughter in the church" and that church's qualitative and numerical growth. Unfeigned, practical love has a divinely generated magnetic power far more effective than evangelistic programs which depend almost entirely on verbal communication. People do not want to hear us talk about love, they want to experience how Christian love really works.

Loving relationships are susceptible to injury from hurts and abuses. So overcome the temptation to retaliate against wrongs, by instead expressing love. And remember, those closest to you should really be your best friends.Practical demonstration of genuine love builds authentic Christian community and encourages others into god's kingdom.

In concrete terms, this also means that a Christian polity should signal a preference for marriage over other forms of sexual partnership; protect children from a rapacious consumer culture; limit the availability of drink, drugs, credit, and opportunities to gamble; and restrict our socially and environmentally destructive habits" of hyper-mobility. In other words, it means limiting liberty; prioritizing the right over the good; and surrendering liberty for the sake of freedom.

We note that Jesus' own ministry was centered on the mentoring of the twelve, and especially the three. This focus on the intensive formation of a “school of thought and practice” accounts in large part for the durable power of Jesus' influence.

Finally, we are reminded of Jesus' summary of God's commandments. Unconditional love to God and love to neighbor of the sort we show to ourselves are the hallmarks of discipleship in the kingdom of God. Relationships are central to everything we do and everything we believe. If God's greatest commandments are as inclusive as I believe they are, when life is over and we receive our report card, it will only have one category—relationships.

Loving relationships are mentally healthy, yet this statement is so elastic it could be stretched to include same sex  marriage and to justify polygamy, marriage to your own mother, or even your lovable pet dog. Yet parallel arguments are now being advanced in the name of biblical justice. Some of us seem to have lost sight of the fact that certain sexual practices are wrong in that they are representing a fundamental violation of God's order, while others of us appear to have forgotten that God's ways (which, from creation, have emphasized male-female unions in holy matrimony) are always best.

Yes, true justice requires us to recognize that He knows what is best for the family and for society and that his standards are ultimately in everyone's best interest - be they heterosexual, homosexual, or other. In fact, agreeing with his standards is the path to liberation, even for those involved in same-sex relationships. What about the fact that Jesus reached out to the disenfranchised and marginalized? to be sure, in doing so, he rebukes a lot of our stiff religiosity, a religiosity that is afraid to get its hands dirty.

Unfeigned, practical love endows a church with a much greater magnetic power than all the marketing efforts of this world. Growing churches manifest a measurably higher love quotient than stagnant or declining ones.

Christian dating is a wondrous and marvelous thing to behold, especially when Church fellowship and community has inspired many marriages, with hundreds of thousands of singles finding love through fellowship and guidance in their Churches.

Our walk with Christ requires that we create and maintain an atmosphere of continual spiritual growth. That we help our fellows recognize, appreciate and utilize their God-given gifts. Worship the Lord in a manner that draws seekers and believers into a closer encounter with God.

Scripture plainly teaches that the witness of the church is only credible by the quality of love expressed among its members. Full devotion to Christ and his cause is normal for every believer.
Loving relationships are the key to a successful congregation. The opportunity to form loving relationships are the key to a powerful outreach. When we let God show us how to love, we take the chains off of God.

Loving relationships are characterized by how we treat one another, by how we prefer and honor one another. It is also demonstrated in how we care and minister to one another privately and corporately. Do we treat each other as Christ would treat us? are we gracious, kind, loving, long-suffering, patient, and faithful? Apostolic churches encourage community with one another and greater intimacy. They encourage life to the fullest, and encourage participation in the lives of others, in sorrow, trial, triumph and joy.

Loving relationships grow as Christ grows in each person and as the Holy Spirit brings healing and restoration. A Church where practical love is lived out endows the church with much greater magnetic power than all marketing efforts this world could muster. Jesus himself said the world would know us by the love we have for one another. Our churches can walk in that love knowing it has the power to turn the world right side up. These characteristics are the signs of a healthy church, and can be found in churches that have fully embraced loving relationships as revealed in the gospels, the book of acts.

Scripture plainly teaches that the witness of the church is only credible by the quality of love expressed among its members. Excellence in all things honors God and inspires people.

Loving relationships are intentional actions, time, and shared experiences. Paid and volunteer leaders should be encouraged to initiate a 1-1 time invitation with a teen at every group meeting.   Inviting students to check out a small group is another significant way to go deeper with teens. Statistics prove that any participation in a trip / camp / retreat, dramatically improves the acceptance of the truth of God by a Non-Christian young person.

When a young person is known by name, face, and heart (where they are spiritually with Jesus) by a paid or volunteer leader, this kind of connectedness can only happen as we “consistently pursue lost kids and engage them in lifelong relationships with Jesus.

Loving relationships are what we as Christians should be about. We are made to be in relationship with God and with one another. And it turns out that science is revealing what scripture has told us all along – it is relationships that make us truly happy. There was interview in the new York times with a Harvard social psychologist named Daniel gilbert, who wrote a book called stumbling on happiness. “we know the best predictor of human happiness is human relationships and the amount of time that people spend with family and friends. We know that it's significantly more important than money and somewhat more important than health. The interesting thing is that people will sacrifice social relationships to get other things that won't make them happy – money. That's what I mean when I say people should do “wise shopping” for happiness.

We would be blessed if you would come and share this life of heaven with us in Church communion. You also, will be blessed as you come and experience the divine power, love & joy of our great God. He knows you and desires to take you from where you are at in your life and transform you to live a life that you've always dreamed of. As God says to us through his word, taste and see that the lord is good.

Loving relationships are displayed by how we treat one another, even when we disagree. Some questions to ask about the relationships in your church are: How are joy and trust experienced, expressed and encouraged in your church life?. How do people support one another and develop new friendships in your church?. How does your congregation intentionally celebrate and build relationships?. How well do people know and understand their leadership styles and use that knowledge to keep disagreement from becoming conflict?.

Loving relationships are positive things which should be encouraged and promoted.
While it has been acknowledged that it has an important part to play in the development of man, several of todays most brilliant minds seem incapable of recognizing its increasing relevance to understanding future generations. It is an unfortunate consequence of our civilizations history that Loving Relationships is rarely given rational consideration by those most reliant on technology.
" practical demonstration of love builds authentic Christian community and brings others" into god's kingdom. Need-orientated evangelism intentionally cultivated relationships with pre-christian people so they can become fully devoted followers of Jesus Christ who are actively participating within the life of the church and community.

Loving relationships are the best context for learning, especially for learning hard lessons via discipline and correction. There will be times when we must learn to let our children fail and suffer the consequences of their actions because these can be the very best lessons, but to do this within a safe environment where the consequences will not be too hard. When it comes to family devotions, have realistic expectations and keep the program simple. Better ten minutes a few days per week than ambitious plans for daily hour long bible studies that never happen.
Pursue friendships with international students and help prepare those who are interested in overseas missions. Develop leaders among students, staff, deacons and elders to effectively equip the church, and effectively multiply their leadership.

Loving relationships are at the core of whole and holy living. His two greatest commands are to love god with all of our heart, soul, and mind and to love our neighbors as ourselves. In grace, scripture also gives us specific rules to guide us in living. Jesus taught that keeping these rules is an expression of love for god. It emphasizes loving relationships and pure motives in living out these rules. Such passages are found throughout the old and new testaments.


The bible describes character qualities and actions that should be present in the lives of humans. These include prayer, kindness, humility, compassion, forgiveness, hospitality, personal integrity, generosity to the poor, care for the oppressed, study of God's word, accountability to one another, sharing our faith with others, recognition of the rights of others, commitment to justice, regular gathering for worship, and living in harmony. The bible also identifies character qualities and actions that should not be present in the lives of believers. For example: destructive anger, malice, rage, sexual immorality, impurity, adultery, evil desires, greed, idolatry, slander, profanity, lying, homosexual behavior, drunkenness, thievery, and dishonesty.

To have a healthy family, we need a relationship with God first (the vertical dimension), and then relationships with each other (the horizontal dimension). The power of the cross is revealed when both dimensions come together (1 john 2:9-11). The relationships we build in small groups are the most vital, so we make them a special priority in our ministry. We prioritize training children, young people and adults to be successful in every aspect of life. Our objective is to get believers established in both their spiritual calling and natural responsibilities. This includes those who have a calling to vocational as well as marketplace ministry. We aim to send those we train to the places God calls them (pr. 24:27, acts 13:1-3) and to continually encourage them as they fulfill this calling.

Loving relationships are built and developing milestones are achieved that will shape and mold the person in which they will aspire to be. To nurture this process, we create an environment of trust and joy that embraces their young minds and their tender hearts to their fullest potential. As we teach to their understanding, we build upon their gifts and talents and give them tools to expand upon their growing knowledge. And through the love and grace of God we lead and guide children in planting seeds of faith and hope for tomorrow.

Loving relationships are most important between husband and wife and kids, husbands and wives “must learn” communication skills. You must learn to talk to one another in order to enjoy a healthy relationship. Pastors must learn these skills and then teach them to their congregations. Nearly as important as communication skills are conflict resolution skills -- that is, how to process anger,  we advise using a group setting, such as a weekend marriage retreat, as a way of acquiring skills in a way that wouldn't put either party on the defensive.

Practical demonstration of love builds authentic Christian community and brings others into God's kingdom. Society is powered by peer pressure, one of the most powerful forces in the world. As long as peer pressure uses its power for good, Love will have its place in society.

Loving relationships are beneficial to the individuals involved and to any children they might have, we want to see couples flourish. We also believe that society, by supporting marriage, benefits as well.

Loving relationships are built among a small group of people who care for each other, share with each other and pray for each other. It's where we seek to "hear" the teachings of Jesus and "put them into practice. This is the way Jesus taught, in a small group of people who did life together. These were his disciples - his students, and we seek to learn from Jesus the same way.

Loving relationships are the first key to a real and healthy Christian life. This article focuses on 2 primary relationships we all need in order to be healthy; our relationship with Christ, and our relationship with Christ's church. Your relationship with Christ begins when you are born again. " now that we belong to Christ, he wants us to be involved in loving relationship with a local group of believers which Jesus calls “my church”. After one is introduced to Christ, it's only natural to want to learn more and explore your faith, which is why we've been offered the alpha course. alpha is a small group study that helps to address Christianity from the perspective of someone who's new. however, it can also be extremely beneficial to those who have been saved for some time.

Loving relationships are totally illogical and incoherent??? I think not. And this seems to be the best way to give a coherent account of the mystery of the trinity and its plural oneness. Erickson wisely points the way to a credible response: “we therefore propose thinking of the trinity as a society of persons, who, however, are one being. While this society of persons has dimensions to its inter-relationships that we do not find among humans, there are some illuminating parallels. Love is the binding relationship within the godhead that unites each of the persons with each of the others. Not surprisingly, Erickson then appeals directly to 1 john 4:8, 16: “God is love. ” do we truly comprehend the depths of this inspired statement that is so disarming in its seeming simplicity?

I would suggest that these three words have a profound contribution to make to our understanding of a God who has eternally preexisted in a state of trinitarian “oneness. ” “the statement... the key question about god has ultimate reference to the issue of his love. And if God is not “love” in the very core of his being, then any questions about his nature quickly descend to a state of biblical irrelevance. We, however, sense that love is the most basic characterization of God. If God is truly—in his very essence—the God of “love” (john 3:16 and 1 john 4:8), then we need to consider the following implications- communicating the good news of God's kingdom with relevance and creativity. - unleashing the uniqueness and creativity inside every individual.

Help students recognize, appreciate and utilize their God given gifts. Prepare students to continue to pursue and serve the lord after graduation. Develop leaders among students, staff, deacons and elders to effectively equip the church effectively multiply their leadership. In pursuit of this vision, we each as believers, can be committed to working as integral parts of the various Christian churches and organizations focused on Loving relationships.

Loving relationships are taking specific actions that people in unsuccessful relationships are not taking. Are you focused on what you don't like in yourself or your partner? do you spend much of your thinking time judging yourself or your partner? or, do you make the spiritual attribute of kindness to yourself and others, including your partner, your highest priority?. People in successful relationships treat themselves and their partner with kindness – kind words, kind actions, kind looks, kind listening, and kind thoughts.

It is far more important to them to be kind than to try to control their partner with. Anger, judgment, criticism, irritation, blame, resistance or withdrawal. People in loving relationships do not make their partner responsible for their feelings. When they feel angry, hurt, anxious, depressed, resentful, irritated, guilty, or shamed, they look within at their own thoughts and behavior that may be causing their painful feelings. They do not see themselves as victims of their partner's choices. Rather, they learn how to manage their own feelings without dumping their upset on their partner.

There are the internal dynamic of day-to-day relationships: if a staff member is having health issues, or a board member marriage problems, will they find support, or condemnation, or indifference in their church? or does anyone even know? if a member of the church is overstepping boundaries and creating conflict, will someone speak with them lovingly and firmly, or will the church wring their hands helplessly and buzz behind their backs? is laughter heard often, and genuine appreciation expressed frequently? these are the dynamics of healthy family life.

Some congregations will also express their love through programs:
Denbok On conflict resolution says, "we might think of a household where one family member is chewing with their mouth open at supper, with their feet on the table. A healthy family dynamic will not plot how to get rid of their eight-year-old. Nor will they beat him into submission, call the police, or ignore the issue while everyone at the table becomes nauseous. A healthy family will address the issue, love the member and insist on good manners at the common table. Addressing conflict is painful in the short run, but actually fosters joy and trust in the end.

Loving relationships are also critical whether it is with family and friends, teammates"or within the church of Christ.In a world full of abandonment and isolation, we do our best to keep our circles open, making sure there is always room for one more.Loving relationships are essential in this regard, and that functional structures for ministry can enhance these objectives, including holistic small groups, empowering leadership and a commitment to training.

We attempt to express these pursuits through fellowship and hospitality, times at the church; deacon ministries; various group activities; care (small) groups; membership classes and the involvement of all willing participants in training, development and implementation of ministries; including leadership training and development, mentoring opportunities and vibrant bible study programs that are inclusive of partnership with one another.

If persons are antagonistic toward one another and gossiping about each other, the church will not move forward in growth and joy, and guests to the church will encounter a place in trouble. Loving relationships are hard, and one must work on them consistently and happily. They are God's plan and I believe they are what he uses to bless and protect us. I feel like a verizon commercial with one huge heavenly component: through Jesus Christ all of heaven is backing up this miracle. I'm just the backup singer to the main ones calling up to God and thanking him for what he has already done. Wholeness, healing, and manifestation of his glory is going on in this hurting world.

Loving relationships are valid and worthy of our respect. Simply put, there is no longer a need to argue their importance; it is clear to see that the results speak for themselves. In my opinion Loving Relationships are, to use the language of the streets 'Super Cool.' and also: 'You win some, you loose some, but Love wins most often.'

I now believe our loving relationships are God's gift to us, evidence of God's presence in our lives. We are coming to Christ to prevent us from acts of spiritual violence that demeans, dishonors and discounts our love for each other. In blessing our relationships, We pray daily that one day all people will add blessing to what god has already done. Until then, we come to Christ asking to stop all acts of spiritual violence against life. Love is taking us forward into God's heavenly Kingdom.


Prayer:
Heavenly Father, I thank you for the gift of wisdom and inspiration and our ability to share it with each other. I thank you for the joy experienced from putting into practice in everyday life, all that you reveal to us, in Christ Jesus mighty name. Amen.

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Rev.Dr.Bola Animashaun (Copyright: 09/10/2009 -ARR)

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